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Up On My High Horse and Armed for Bear

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I still cry.  I wish I didn’t but I do. Maybe because I am a mother. Maybe it’s just because I am human. I will listen to my daughter singing softly to herself as she puts on her shoes in the morning and the tears start to well. I read the blogs or posts written as tributes and I sob. All of the fear, anger and frustration I feel rear its ugly head in unstoppable tears and sorrow.

I never cried at the deaths of strangers before last Friday. I was saddened and shocked by the murders of twelve students and a teacher at Columbine High School. I exclaimed how sad and terrible it was when ten Amish schoolgirls were held hostage and shot. I shuttered and shook my head in disgust and outrage at the shooting of thirty-two students at Virginia Tech. I was horrified by the mass shooting in a movie theater in Colorado.

But I didn’t cry.

I also never really discussed the matters or even gave it much thought past my initial reaction. I did not question why these hideous crimes occurred. I never asked what could I do in any small measure to stop this violence. How can I make this world safer for my child? These thoughts never entered my mind. I just chalked it up to the sad, scary world we live in and counted my blessings that this violence didn’t touch anyone I knew and loved.

We are immune to murder and violence in this country.  I would say we are almost nonchalant about it. According to the FBI, a violent crime occurs in this country every 26.2 seconds. Every 26 seconds!!  We should be outraged. But we are not. The news report these crimes every night and we label it and move on. There is nowhere to escape it. In the small towns and the big cities, violence is part of our culture, our everyday lives. Even with the recent tragedy in Connecticut, people really do not want to talk about it because it is “too horrible.”

But we need to talk. We need to debate. We need to come together as a nation and people and demand change. We need to scream from the rooftops that this violence is not acceptable in our house. We need to ask the tough questions and try to answer them. We need to discuss mental health funding. We need to ask why a law-abiding citizen needs to carry a semiautomatic weapon or more specifically, a Bushmaster .223 assault rifle similar to the weapons used by our soldiers in Afghanistan.

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I was appalled to read that gun and ammunition sales surged in the wake of the massacre at Sandy Hill Elementary. Gun lovers were out in droves trying to stockpile before a potential government reaction to the Connecticut murders. This love of guns is not new but it has been fostered and nourished by our complacency as a society about gun violence. As Andrew Cohen of The Atlantic so eloquently and perfectly wrote:

Whatever else it means, Friday’s tragedy is just another awful reminder of the disconnect that exists in America between the lengths to which we as parents (and teachers and school administrators) are always willing to sacrifice for our children when the bullets are flying and what we all are always unwilling to sacrifice for our children when the guns go silent. We rush to protect our kids from imminent death by gunfire but are content to allow thousands upon thousands of our children to die each year as a result of gun violence.

The thought of losing a child is every parent’s worst nightmare. Unfortunately, I know too many people who have experienced this loss and have seen firsthand the unbearable pain they must endure as they continue on their lives without their precious child. I am heartbroken for the parents of the 20 Sandy Hook first graders who were murdered. They are strangers but I cry for them.  The nation cries for them. But our tears will not bring back those beautiful children or their beloved teachers. Neither will the sympathies and sentiments of politicians who are conveniently open to change under the glaring lights of this international news story. Now is a time for meaningful debate and action. This will only happen if we as citizens demand it. Only if, just this once, we do not let this tragedy quickly become yesterday’s news.


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